Well, yet another Thanksgiving has flown by. I didn’t gain as much weight as I thought I would, which I had mixed feelings about. My feelings about weight gain on Thanksgiving are odd, but it is the one holiday themed around eating. Or the pilgrims, whichever comes first. But after my Thanksgiving hiatus ended, I coldly welcomed Black Friday in to my thoughts, and mind. Black Friday to me was just the day millions of people spend a holiday waiting in line to get a twenty five percent discount on a over-priced lamp that their aunt has been dropping hints about. That made me doubt that I would ever waste time on that. Of course, I had to go this year, because I saw a nutcracker that I really wanted. I wanted it so badly, that my need to get it would collapse upon itself, and a vortex will open up and strip the world of every nutcracker in existence. It happened, and I dodged bull-like people, jumped over the aisles, and was charged twice for the item. Of course, only one of those things actually happened. I spent the rest of the day acknowledging the fact that I risked my life, and got the nutcracker. That ended quickly, but right now, all I hear anyone talk about is Christmas. New traditions, like the elf on the shelf, come home on Thanksgiving, which I find terrible, ignoring the fact that you are basically celebrating Christmas on Thanksgiving. I love Thanksgiving, and everyone is just moving past it so quickly. People are taking down inflatable turkeys. All that was once pilgrim is no more anymore. And as all this is happening, I realize one thing…
I’m not letting Thanksgiving go
I know this may be odd coming from the guy who, quote on quote, bought a 90 dollar 6.5 ft angel Christmas decoration, but bare with me here. But I just can’t believe that one second people are yelling after a football game and letting the sweet taste of sweet potatoes fill their minds, and the next one everyone is back on their weight loss plan, and stabbing forks in inflatable turkeys, letting venom in to the world. Of course I decorate the day after Thanksgiving, and live to tell the tale. But when other people do it, it annoys me. I want to make these people listen to me. I want them to make this holiday last for more then 24 hours. But, sadly, no-one ever does. All I really want is a holiday that will las longer then usual. You know what, maybe I will just make a week long Thanksgiving, and call it, “Plymouth Week.” Wish me luck spreading it!
(pretend you are now hearing loud sobs)