As an N.J. native, I know that I have a right to say that New Jersey is a lot better than people think of it to be. But, I have also heard many jokes that people make to make fun of this gorgeous state, and I am SICK of it!!!! Because N.J. is most definitely not just a state full of stupid people with an exaggerated accent who go down the shore and get tans. So, to defend who we really are, here are 16 Reasons New Jersey Is Most Definitely NOT the Armpit of America!
1.) It really is the best place to go to the beach in the country
There really is no other place to go swimming other than New Jersey. And, if you live there, the beach is only like an hour away!
2.) Who needs to get out of our car to pump our own gas when someone who works there can do it for us?
Not having to get out of the car to pump gas just shows we are one step further to living like kings!!!
3.) New Jersey is stuffed to the brim with unique and inspiring history
You can’t take a turn in this sacred land without bumping in to a historical wonder, unless you are in New York! I hope you enjoyed that one Blasio!
4.) TAYLOR HAM!!!!!
Nowhere else in this country can you find meat as savory and sweet as this pig grind!!!
5.) Where subs are 100% Hoagie
Hoagie is a lot more entertaining to say than sub, you have to give me that one.
6.) Building and monuments are awe-inspiring
Looking up at a site like this under the stars is something that will definitely strike you, and stuff like the Barnegat Lighthouse like in the picture will put you in a better place than anything in the city will!
7.) Nowhere else in America, wait, THE WORLD… can you find pizza the size of a baby child!!!
See??? Nowhere else in the country can you get a baby-sized slice, or technically even get any GOOD pizza!!!!
8.) BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN!!!!
How could anyone mock the home of Bruce Springsteen!!!!! The monsters who’d even dare to…..
9.) We pronounce syrup right
Do I even need to explain? It is pronounced seer-up, not sir-up! Gosh!
10.) The N.J. Boardwalks; where precious memories are made
It doesn’t matter if it is the Wildwood one, Ocean City, or any other one, as long as it is in Jersey! Because we make things magical. And why everything in N.J. is magical, it’s because it is in the most beautiful armpit anyone would ever see!
11.) WE HAVE OUR OWN DEVIL!!!!
Yup. I bet no native from somewhere else can say that a menacing beast like this has been flying and freaking people out around their state! It lives in the pine barrens, just to let the investigators the key to run wildly after this thing.
12.) In our proud state, we have a series of books, and a magazine that goes on and on about the interesting things that go on in this bountiful land!
Weird N.J. has been proudly sharing THE TRUTH with all of the natives for years now. And, by the looks of it, I don’t think that they will run out of material anytime soon, if you know what I mean, because we have a very interesting state! If we can have more horses than Kentucky, be able to drive for just an hour to get to N.Y.C or Philly, have pizza the size of babies, and can also house the most dangerous city in the nation, we can DEFINITELY fill up books the size of who knows how many multi-million dollar homes!
13.) I think that the only reason that N.J. has bad reputation was because of the worst thing that happened to it…
The infamous TV show ‘Jersey Shore’ probably was. And, that brought up unfair stereotypes that made New Jersians always look like they are about to say ‘Joisey’ at any second, and make us look like all the time we go surfing down at the beach, always be worried about getting tans, and finally making it seem like men are supposed to be these hunky hunks of meat. Thanks a lot, REALITY TV! THAT’S NOT EVEN A REALITY!!!
14.) We have the lowest gas prices in the country!
Yup. Cry about it, NEW YORKERS!!! While we talk like if some hunk of ham formed a mouth, you will pay extra for gas!
15.) At least we actually experience the four seasons!
New Jersey is one of the very few states that ever get to fully experience the seasons. While it is freezing in the Winter, and hot in the Summer, people from Florida and California only see Summer. It’s like that movie, The Endless Summer, except in this case, really, really, sad.
16.) The absolute beauty and serenity stored in what people think to be this small state full of toughneck dungbettles
What people think to be this colossal trash can is really this beautiful and serene state full of countless wonders. Would you rather look through at the polluted streets of the city, or be bewildered by the sights of N.J. That’s what I thought.
Alright, by now I hope you have realized that N.J. is not the armpit of America, but if it is, the States is lucky to have this wonderful an armpit. It is a wonderful place, either if you want to call it home or not. But in this case, I do.