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Well, it is the time of year to be thankful for what we have. I know that I am, and to give light on such a wonderful occasion, here are some bad jokes that I stole from the internet. Here is the 2nd annual edition of THE COMPLETE THANKSGIVING JOKE COMPILATION!!!


Q.) Why did the turkey cross the road?

A.) To get the hunters to think it was a chicken!

Q.) If fruit originally comes from a fruit tree, then what tree does a turkey come from?

A.) A poul-tree!

Q.) What cat discovered America?

A.) Christofurry Columbus!

Q.) What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?

A.) Squash!

Q.) What were the turkey’s final words before being put in the oven?

A.) ‘Wow, I’m stuffed!”

Q.) What is a scarecrows favorite fruit?

A.) STRAW-berries!

Q.) Why did the dealership sell off so many cars this Thanksgiving?

A.) Because everyone wanted an autumn-obile!

Q.) What do you call rain on Thankgiving?

A.) Fowl weather!

Q.) If April flowers bring May showers, what do May flowers bring?

A.) Pilgrims!

Q.) What would you get if you were to cross a pilgrim with a graham cracker?

A.) A pilgraham!

Q.) Why do turkeys always go ‘gobble gobble?’

A.) Because they never learned proper table etiquette!

Q.) Why did the police go after the turkey?

A.) Because it was suspected of FOWL play!

Q.) What do you call a turkey that has been dropped out of a helicopter?

A.) Dead weight!

Q.) Why did the pilgrims sail from England to America?

A.) Because they missed their plane!

Q.) If the pilgrims were alive today, what would they be famous for?

A.) Their age!

Q.) What movie do the kids watch on Thanksgiving?

A.) The mighty turducken!

Before we end, I’d like to say something. Today, in school, we had a little Thanksgiving ‘feast.’ All it basically is is giving up real lunch to eat a tangerine, a fistful of Smartfood popcorn and some baby carrots. My friend Jacob went around pleading with others to give up their tangerines for the sake of him. He managed to collect around 5. As he was to begin eating one of them, he got out his thumb and jabbed it right through the nucleus of the poor fruit. Then, as if he hasn’t done enough as he did, apparently the first event was the herald as of what was about to happen next, so, as if he were, himself, a human orange juice maker, he lifted the tangerine up to his mouth and squeezed the juice, leaving the carcass of what once was a fruit upon his plant, as he advanced to the other, what preceded meaning nothing to him. Apparently, he gave all of them names, so, firstly, I’d like to give my condolences to those poor tangerines.

Sally- The boundaries were sight high for sweet little Sally, but the universe had other plans. Rest well.

Billy- Always the one making the world ahead of everyone on this planet a great one, we bid our goodbyes.

Bobnut- There was no limits to the strength of Bobnut’s heart.

And, then my phone died before I could finish my list, so the last two names are unknown but the warmth they left us are still in our hearts. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!