CHRISTMAS ERMAHGERD IT’S DECEMBER!!! The month of joy, hope, love, and everything else that I am in such a rush and happy state to recall at this moment! Today, I’d like to focus in on one of the many weird aspects of this holiday, set aside the obvious one; there is a holiday that in modern times is centered around a fat man somehow managing to fit in a chimney? I never understood why no-one thought that it sounded a little unbelievable. Anyone above 200 I don’t think would have a chance fitting in to the square hole that is a chimney. Alright, before I sidetrack myself and get myself involved in a string of caffeinated rants as I normally do on a topic that I normally wouldn’t give two cents about, let us start with the gallery of horrifying Santa Clause pictures!
1.) Bearded Out
Even on number one I think that is enough nightmare fuel to last a month in a small country. And don’t ask me why his nose is orange or why the boy is dressed as a cowboy.
2.) No words
I really hope this isn’t an abduction situation. Take a gaze in to those black, hopeless eyes and I am almost positive you will see death wrapped in a raw egg. I DON’T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE!!!
3.) WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON IN THIS PICTURE?!
Judging by the bunny like figure stepping in, I don’t know if this is Easter from heck or a Unibrow Christmas.
There goes any chance of sleep tonight!
5.) No word pt.2
THIS IS WORSE THAN THE OTHERS!!!! WHY THE HECK IS THAT CHILD SMILING?!
6.) Call the priest!
If this appears at my bedside today I won’t be so surprised. If it turns out he is the summon from a demon of the underworld I wouldn’t be either.
7.) He sees you when you’re sleeping…
I read this in a book lately called Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children, and in it it was described as a soul stealing monster. So, basically what it looks like.
8.) He knows when you’re awake…
Nothing else expressed on this here earth can replace the feeling of sheer terror that washed over me once I first laid my eyes on this American Horror Story reject. Oh my god, that doesn’t even begin to compare…
9.) SO BE GOOD FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!!!!!!!
And now there is another to add to my list of nightmares tonight!
10.) HE’S WATCHING…
Just don’t look in the eyes…
Alright then. Do I have to celebrate Christmas this year? Because I think these pictures say otherwise.